


My Endurance

by greekowl87



Category: The X-Files
Genre: Episode: s06e10 Tithonus, F/M, Fluff, Post-Episode: s10e06 My Struggle II, Sort Of Fluff, angst eventually, immortal scully?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-27
Updated: 2016-06-17
Packaged: 2018-06-04 20:19:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 7,835
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6674125
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/greekowl87/pseuds/greekowl87
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>She smiled slightly and replied, “I want you to close your eyes, Mulder. Can you do that for me?”</p><p>“No,” he stammered. “No. I won't lose sight of you.”</p><p>“You won't,” she soothed, taking her other hand and grasping his tightly. “I am right here.”<br/>...<br/>Post My Struggle II. Inspired from the episode “Tithonus” .  Complete.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Salvation

**Author's Note:**

> A lot of ideas have been rattling around in my head. I've loved the X-Files since the first run when I was in my adolescence but I never attempted fanfic until I was fourteen with Farscape. I haven't written fanfic in over ten years, much less attempted an X-Files fanfic. So, there's a first with that. I think with this piece though, I'm getting back into writing fanfic again. :) Please let me know what you think. I wrote this first piece at 3 am with a bout of insomnia with no beta reader.
> 
> Disclaimer: I own none of these characters. Chris Carter and company do. I just wanted to get some creative ideas out.

The blue light came out of nowhere, and likely a finely tuned scoped, homed on her, Mulder, and Miller. On a bridge, jammeded with traffic, the world failing around her, she felt a moment of sheer terror envelope her. She remembered her own abduction and the night she had been caught on a bridge with Cassandra Spencer. She thought, this is it.

 “Scully!

Mulder. Despite the world ending, sheer doom impending, he was her one constant, his own touchstone, to use his own words. Her attention was snapped again, hearing someone scream. She could not make out the words except, “He's dead!”

 She turned her head in he direction of the sound and suddenly, her memory recalled Alfred Fellig from all those years ago from that case in New York.

 “ _How do you know when people are about to die?”_

 “ _Oh...You chase it long enough you pick it up.”_

 Then she remembered being shot, him taking her hand...

 “ _Do you see him? Do you see him? Don't look. Close your eyes_.”

 A million thoughts were swarming her mind in that instant. She remembered how the world felt when she was on the brink of death. She felt it now, but not for her...

“Agent Scully!” Miller called, snapping her out thoughts. “Agent Mulder...”

 Mulder. She bent down on her knees and cupped Mulder's cheek within her hand. His eyes lolled back in his head before he blinked and tried to focus on her. Her thumb traced his jawline lovingly and she asked in a whisper, “Do you trust me, Mulder?”

He grinned, his humor still trying to get the best of her, even on the brink of death. “Is that even a serious question, Scully?”

She smiled slightly and replied, “I want you to close your eyes, Mulder. Can you do that for me?”

“No,” he stammered. “No. I won't lose sight of you.”

“You won't,” she soothed, taking her other hand and grasping his tightly. “I am right here.” She paused and looked to Agent Miller, who, despite being infected with the virus as well, looked far better off. “Get the vaccine together, Agent Miller.”

He nodded and set to work preparing the bag.

She focused back on Mulder who coughed raggedly and lurched forward in pain. She caught him in her shoulder and kissed his cheek lovingly. “Close your eyes with me, Mulder. Please. I am right here with you. We'll do it together.”

“Why?”

Death. She could sense it was close. Ever since that day she had been fatally shot, she should have died. But she did not. She healed quickly, far quicker than should have been possible. Fellig had been right, she thought bitterly. She had avoided Death and it took him. She was not about to let it take Mulder or her. There were too many things to do. William. Her mind raced again. Was he okay?

“Scully, why?”

“Please, Mulder,” she begged, resting her forehead against his. “For me.”

He rolled his eyes and then closed them tight. She did the same. She wrapped her arm around his neck protectively and whispered, “I love you, forever.”

He hugged her tightly in response, whispering, “I love you too.”

Through her closed eyes, she could feel Mulder, him barely hanging out to life, but she could sense It as well. It was close. She heard another scream of sorrow not too far from her. Please, she prayed, not him, please don't take him from me as well.

The air grew cold and she could hear Miller rummaging around the car, trying to get he vaccine ready. She whispered a silent prayer for Death to pass him as well. “Agent Scully? The light. It's gone!”

She inwardly breathed a sigh of relief, but still felt It's presence. “Mulder,” she whispered.

“This is dumb, Scully.”

“Just keep your eyes closed until I tell you, okay? You got to trust me.”

“I do. That's why my eyes are still closed.” 

What felt like an eternity passed. She heard another random sob of sorrow in the distance, further from them. The coldness had abated. She breathed again and caressed his cheek. “Mulder, are you still with me?”

“It's going to take a lot more to get rid of me,” he replied with a weak chuckle

She smiled, despite herself, caressing his cheek. “Told you I was immortal,” she teased.

“I guess I am too,” he grinned.

Agent Miller handed her the vaccine and she carefully fixed the IV needle and the bag. He breathed a sigh of relief when he felt the cool liquid going into his veins. She ran her fingers through his hair. “I managed to synthesize a vaccine from my alien DNA...it looks promising and hopefully you should be on the mend.”

“Now I know I definitely immortal,” he whispered, closing his eyes.

“Why?”

“I got a part of you in me,” he whispered.

 

….

 

He opened his eyes to midday sun filtering in through the hazy curtains. He could hear a duck calling in the distance, crickets, frogs...this wasn't his farm house. He rubbed his eyes wearily, wondering where he was. “Morning,” came a familiar voice from the door.

His eyes focused to see Scully leaning causally against the doorframe in a large sweater and jeans. She smiled. He had not seen a smile like that in a long time. Happiness. Relief. Just relishing the present with him. She pushed herself up from the door frame and made her way to his bed side. “Easy there, Mulder, I don't need you running off to save the world any time soon.”

“Where are we?”

“Hm. Agent Miller dropped us off here. It's a little place on one of the peninsulas, off the Chesapeake Bay. He said he grew up here and it would be safe for us while you recovered,” she answered. “It reminds me of the farmhouse, but I think we should invest in waterfront property.” She winked.

We...

He had been dying to hear those words...we, us, together...anything.

“So...”

“I never stopped loving you,” she replied slowly, pressing her hand to his forehead, checking for a fever. “I just needed space. But I learned how empty it was not having you in that space. There is no me. There is only us. You just had to go and rub my face in it by almost dying.”

He smiled, leaning back into the bed. “You saved me.”

“I know." 

“I mean you saved me from the moment you walked into that basement office in 1992.”

She kissed his forehead lovingly. “You're not supposed to flirt with your doctor.”

“I am a patient who requires extra special care.” He paused, taking her hand in his. “How did you know?”

“What?” she asked absently, continuing with her exam of him. 

“How to save me?" 

“The vaccine...”

“No. The other thing. You told me to close my eyes. Why?”

She paused and forced a smile. “Something Fellig said to me.” She held out a pill. “Take this.”

He took the pill without question. He narrowed his eyes, searching her face. What wasn't she telling him? “Scully...”

“You're alive, I am alive,” she surmised. “What does it matter? I am still madly in love with you and I want to spend the rest of my life with you. We should be happy.”

“I am thrilled,” he coughed.

“Easy. The vaccine apparently just puts everything back in the right spot. You're body is still rebuilding your immunity system. You'll feel like shit for the next couple of weeks but we'll get through it.”

There is was again. “I'm already feeling better.”

“You said _we_ as in relationship _we._ ”

She grinned, kissing his brow. “I guess this isn't the best time to tell you I want to move back in?” 

“I welcome it,” he whispered, closing his eyes. “I love you, Scully.”

“I love you too, Mulder.”

 

….

 

He was out cold. During the few moments of consciousness he had over the previous week, he always called out for her. She gave him a sleeping pill to ensure he rested, in order to heal and let his body recover. The house that they were staying at overlooked the marshes and the Chesapeake Bay itself. She found it peaceful.

Stepping into the kitchen, Scully brewed herself some green tea and took it out the porch, leaving the door slightly ajar encase anything were to happen to Mulder. She sat on one of the old rocking chairs, blowing on the cup of tea, before taking a sip. Mulder was safe for now. But he thoughts drifted to William. What was their next move? What would happen? Civilization was slowly recovering from this. Luckily, the death counts were not as tragic as anticipated but still people died. But the vaccine helped.

Scully rocked the chair thoughtfully, her mind going a thousand different places, as she overlooked the Chesapeake Bay. He was safe and they were together. That's all that mattered right now.

 


	2. Ripples

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Okay, my take on the cliffhanger Post “My Struggle II.” When I was writing this, I drew inspiration from the episode “Tithonus” and I have flashbacks to the conversations.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am trying to flesh out this fic, that was supposed to be a oneshot, but it is turning into a beast of its own. So, if you've stuck with me this far, thank you. I really do appreciate it. :) P.S. Still don't have a beta reader so sorry for any grammar or typo errors.
> 
> Disclaimer: Again, the usual deal. Chris Carter and company own. I don't own any of it, just borrowing it for some creativity.

 Scully relaxed in the living room of the farm house that they once shared that resided outside D.C. in one of the untouched places outside of Washington D.C. in rural Virginia. She wouldn't admit it to Mulder, but she had discretely been moving her stuff back in. It started out small, some clothes, overnight items...then she brought those 600 hundred count Egyptian cotton sheets. He was still recovering from the ordeal, although he was still recovering faster than the others who had received the vaccine. He complained like a sick child but once he slept on those sheets, he shut up. Besides, playing doctor and concerned (FBI and life) partner, she had determinedly taken up residence in their home once again in the name of taking care of him during his recovery. It was nice being home again. They were only had the little shack on the water for less than a week before he started demanding that they go home and she obliged. Although she had yet to tell him, Scully was ready to come home again.

Skinner had not said anything to her about the unusual circumstances of her requested leave from work to care for Mulder. Maybe 15 years ago when their relationship had first began to bloom, but not now.

She paused, sipping her morning coffee at the kitchen table, straining her ears, hearing Mulder's strained and stuffy nose snores echoing off the walls of the second floor. Just like the vaccine was supposed to, his body was rebuilding the his immunity system. But she found it peculiar that it was doing it much faster than those others who had received the vaccines. She would read the medical reports from the hospital and CDC as it began to mass produce the vaccine for the populous. It was predicting a month in order for a patient to recover fully, if not longer, depending on the extent of exposure. Mulder had been one of the worst though, on the point of death, but of all the patient case reports she read, his recovery was the fastest.

And as thankful as she should be, it bothered her.

“ _You know, most people want to life forever.”_

“ _Most people are idiots. Which is one of the reasons why I don't._ ”

 She had not thought about that case in years. Sometimes, Clyde Bruckman's words to her lingered in the back of her mind; she wouldn't die. Then she met Fellig in New York City.

 “ _Why are you this way? I mean, if this is true give me something in the way of proof...help me find some kind of science that I can hang this on.”_

 “ _It has nothing to do with science. Someone took my place.”_

 “ _Took your place?_

 “ _I don't know her name. I don't think I ever knew it. I had yellow fever way the hell back then when it killed half of New York. Washington Square Park was a common grave they had so many bodies. They'd bury them shallow. They wrapped them in-in yellow sheets and the yellow sheets would stick up through the mud. I was in a city-run contagion ward. I was out of my head with fever... out of my mind. And I saw him-- saw Death. Wish I had had a camera then. At first, I... just saw him out of the corner of my eye. Then he got bolder and he started flitting around the room and he'd take this person and he'd take that person and I never saw his face. I didn't want to see his face. I figured if I saw it, he'd take me, too.”_

 Scully closed her laptop and drummed her fingers on the coffee table. She remembered Fellig telling her to close her eyes when she had been shot and he died instead of him. She shuddered and closed her eyes, trying to dispel any ill thoughts of Death. Mulder was alive. She was alive. She prayed William was safe. That was all that mattered.

….

 “What are you doing?” she asked, coming into the kitchen. She dropped her car keys on the counter and took off her jacket, laying it over the kitchen chair.

 Mulder, unshaven, his brown hair tousled, and wearing baggy lounge pants and blue tee shirt smiled at her. “Cooking us breakfast.”

 “Mulder, it's eight o'clock at night.”

 “I know, breakfast for dinner. You haven't eaten in dinner yet probably, I actually have an appetite, and I want to take care of you for once, since you saved me and have been taking care of me,” he replied with a shrug.

 She smiled, touched by the simple gesture. She walked behind him and without thinking, wrapped her arms around his waist in a hug and kissed his shoulder blade. “It smells good,” she responded.

He froze briefly but relaxed, feeling the familiar petite warmth against his back. “Well, I hope you're hungry. I am making your favorite,” he replied. She nodded in reply and felt her stomach rumble in response. He chuckled. “Where were you this afternoon?”

“I had to go by the office to pick up a few things, and then by the hospitial.”

“Are you thinking of leaving the FBI again?”

“No. We have work to do,” she replied, adding after a moment, “and these past few months have been very...special to me.”

She looked up from his shoulder as he turned his head and stole a kiss. An unspoken message of love, trust, and devotion went between them. Mulder did not want to spoil this moment. Ever since she left, he prayed for this. The past few months, ever since they started working at the FBI together again, it was like riding a bike as they fell back into old patterns but there was something deeper there but he could not touch. But now, the complex layers of their relationship had found it's balance, swirling together like a cosmic mandala.

“Why don't you get comfortable and change? Dinner should be ready in ten minutes,” he suggested.

“Mulder,” she paused, before pulling away.

“Hm?”

“I love you.” Scully could say those words enough to him. He had to know. She had watched him die once and be taken from her, she had almost lost him again. She did not want to leave any ill thoughts of their relationship...just in case. “I just wanted to tell you that.”

He smiled and kissed her again in affirmation. “Go make yourself comfortable.”

….

Mulder was out again, fast asleep in the bed beside her. Despite him cooking dinner and talking animatedly with her over the kitchen table, it had drained him of his energy. One of the few things that remained in his recover was the fatigue; it reminded her so much of the fatigue one got when battling the flu. But she had put him to bed, and an hour later followed behind him.

Old habits died hard, she supposed. She gazed thoughtfully at him and ran her fingers through his hair. He murmured something in his sleep, turned on his side, facing her. She smiled and relaxed against the pillows and drew out her reading glasses.

Carefully, so not to disturb him, she pulled out the reason why she had stopped at their FBI office earlier in the day.

The file was heavy and musty with age. It still had that red border and striped tape on it. She ran her fingers over the FBI seal and the case number 'X 169948'. She remembered writing the report officially, Mulder helping fill in the blanks with the background check. The x-file case report of Alfred Fellig. She played with the edge of the file folder, almost afraid to open it. She glanced at Mulder and then lifted her shirt slightly, revealing the small gunshot wound right above her belly button.

She remembered being shot, the pain, the agony. She remembered closing her eyes. She remembered Mulder coming to visit her in the hospital right after her surgery. She closed her eyes and touched the scar, as if invoking the memory.

“ _Coroner's report came back on Fellig. Says he died of a single gunshot wound. That's all it said” He paused awkwardly, squeezing her hand affectionately. “Well, I, ...talked to your doctor and..he says you're doing great. You're making the fastest recovery he's ever seen.”_

_Scully shifted uncomfortably in the hospital bed. “Yeah, Mulder, I don't even know how I entertained the thought. People don't live forever.”_

“ _No, no, I-I...I think he would have. I-I just think that...that death only looks for you...once you seek its opposite._ ”

“Scully?” he called sleepily. “Why are you still up?”

He rubbed his eyes, trying to get the sleep from it. She jumped slightly, hiding the file beneath the covers and pulling off her glasses. “I was reading,” she stuttered, trying to find a convincing lie. “Did I wake you?”

She discretely pushed the file off to the side, slipping it into her bag that rested by the bedside. She took off her glasses and put them on the nightstand. He narrowed her eyes, sensing something off with her, but he let it slide. He was too tired too care. She was exhausted too, he could see it. Sleepily, he reached for her hand and Scully let Mulder pull her beneath the covers and entwined their bodies. She reached up turning off the light as he nuzzled her shoulder and sighed happily. “I missed this.”

She pushed her insecurities and fears about Mulder and Fellig away. She pulled him closer and whispered, “I did too.”

“I wish you would make this permanent,” he mumbled, half asleep, already drifting back off to unconsciousness.

Scully smiled, sensing this was the moment to ask. “I can, if that is okay?” she whispered in response.

He squeezed her lovingly, kissing her neck and whispered, “I would love nothing more, Scully.”

She could almost giggle, feeling incredibly happy. The thoughts of Death, Fellig, and the ramifications of Mulder's healing was pushed into the deepest corner of her mind. She closed her eyes, feeling his warm breath against her neck, his familiar weight against her back and around her body, his comforting warmth. Her constant. Her insecure mind found a brief moment to interrupt her happiness, flashing back to Fellig...

“ _What about love?” she asked._

“ _What does that last forever? Forty years ago I drove down to the city hall, down to the hall of records...record archives, whatever they call it. I wanted to look up my wife. It...bothered me I couldn't remember her name. Love lasts...seventy-five years, if you're lucky. You don't want to be around when it's gone_.”

Damn it, she groaned inwardly, trying to burrow into Mulder's embrace even more to rid herself of those thoughts and remind herself of him. He was here. He was alive. They were making amends with their relationship. Nothing would take him from her. Nothing would, she repeated her self. Scully kept repeating that, almost like a mantra, before she was able to fall asleep, safe in Mulder's arms.


	3. Questions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> My post episode take of “My Struggle II” but with inspiration from the episode “Tithonus.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Short chapter because I want to really branch out and get nitty-gritty with the next chapter. Sorry.
> 
> Seriously, with this being the first piece of fanfic that I have written in ten years, I've got the bug again. I have so many ideas I wanna get down. The past two chapters I wrote within the space of a few hours with no beta reader. This chapter is short because I want to flush out the majority of the plot in the next chapter. As always, for those of you following or even take the time to read my piece of work, thank you from the bottom of my heart.
> 
> Disclaimer: The usual suspects, I own none of this, Chris Carter and company does, just merely borrowing.

It was Saturday morning. It was still early. Really early. Three a.m. early. He shifted in bed, arching his neck to glance at the at the digital alarm clock's comforting mute white glow that filtered throughtout the room. Mulder groaned at the thought of having to go back to work first thing Monday morning and the impending report that was going to be written by them. Some things never changed. But some things do.

Scully lay sound asleep, melted to his side. He moved his feet slightly and saw Daggoo look up from the end of the bed, disapprovingly, before settling his head back down at the edge of the bed. He had almost forgotten about the dog. The dog had been watched by neighbors all while the near apocalypse had occurred. And now that she had agreed to move back in, he found himself with a new roommate. But that didn't really bother him. He smiled, nuzzling her head and she grunted in her sleep approvingly. He smiled into her hair and relaxed, just enjoying the moment.

He had fully recovered without issue. He knew he had recovered faster than the others. Scully did not elaborate why although he suspected she knew. But he was alive, she was alive, their relationship was alive. Somehow that was all that mattered these days and he was happy with that. At fifty-five, he wasn't the young spud he used to be. But he felt himself crawling out of a darkness again, and with Scully by his side, he was sure to make it.

He sighed, contemplating the past few weeks. She groaned in her sleep, distressed, tensing, but quickly relaxed. He kissed her hair instinctively, willing any nightmares away. She relaxed slightly and turned into him. He smiled and looked up to the darkened ceiling.

Mulder thought for certain he was going to die. As they got closer to Washington D.C., he began to feel colder and felt like something had been waiting for him. Death. He had been certain of it. All of his luck had run out. And he had felt nothing but regret. Regret for not being in his son's life, regret for not being able to stop this, and regret for letting Scully walk out of his life. So much regret. 

There was a little that he remembered between crossing the Virginia boarder and that bridge. He remembered the light and Scully staring fixedly at it, as if memorized. But something broke her out of her concentration. She had looked wildly at him. She asked him if he trusted her. What sort of question was that? Then he wanted him to close his eyes.

Mulder hugged her closer unconsciously, closing his eyes, letting his mind wander. He remembered feeling so cold but her holding him tightly, with both of their eyes closed, he held on. The the coldness faded and Scully had relaxed. He remembered Miller administrating the vaccine, but most of all, he remembered her blue eyes and smile, full of so much love and hope. 

He did not question his survival but something, deep down, it was beginning to nag at him. And he knew Scully well enough that something was bothering her as well.

She shifted in her sleep and he spotted an old x-file, red tape and old, stuffed haphazardly into her briefcase resting at her bedside. He was careful, reaching arcross her petitie body and grabbing the file. Alfred Fellig. He sighed and glanced at her worriedly.

Why did she have this file?

….

Saturday. 5:45 A.M.

Scully had awoken before Mulder and before the sun. She walked Daggoo out in the yard, watching the little Jack Russell mutt run wildly, chasing after squirrels and birds. Even the country seemed to be doing the little dog good. Whistling, she called the little dog back in before grabbing a cup of coffee, a large oversize sweatshirt, and sat on the steps of the porch to watch the sunrise.

With the oncoming Monday, they both would be returning to work, back to the FBI, back to almost normalcy. She shifted and sipped the hot coffee, letting her thoughts drift. Since they had returned to the FBI, they fell into old patterns developed over years. But beneath the surface, there was this tension that couldn't resolve itself, but now...

Were they back together again? Did asking to move home justify it? She never stopped loving him. He never stopped loving her. Maybe they never really broke up. Maybe they just briefly found themselves lost and found again. She smiled at the thought. Maybe. Maybe they weren't meant to be together forever. She remembered recalling Fellig's words about love, how, if you're lucky, it only lasts 75 years. Bull shit, she thought determinedly, taking another sip of her coffee.

She was not as young as she used to be. Sure, they had sex, made love, but there was more to it, a real emotional connection that a part of her being that she could not ever let go. But that emotional connection, she actually felt genuine peace, contentment, and faith in their future together, for the first time in a long time. 

She heard Daggoo running around excitedly in the house, telling her that Mulder was up. She heard him moving into the kitchen and then finally joining her on the porch. “You were always an early riser.”

She bent her head up, giving him a good morning kiss. He returned it, slow and lovingly. “Did you sleep at all?” he asked gently, sitting beside her.

She shrugged. “I had a hard time falling asleep. I dozed sometimes.”

“I remember,” he replied. He wrapped his arm around her shoulder and pulled her towards him. “Try to relax.”

She let her body go limp like a rag doll and rest herself on his shoulder and bicep. “This is all too surreal, like the first time we made love together,” she admitted in a whisper. “Do you remember?”

“The start of a new millennium,” he joked, kissing her hair.

She chuckled. “Unfamiliar territory ahead, Ahab.”

“Nothing we can't handle, Starbuck.”

Silence encroached them as the sun began to rise. Scully sighed and closed her eyes, feeling Mulder squeeze his arm around her. This. This moment. This moment she tried to imagine and engrave into her mind like a priceless sculpture that was essential to history. Their history. The sun had taken on a luminous orange glow that reflected red and purple throughout the clouds. There was a light fog surrounding the property that clung like like a ghost to the past.

This moment.

Nothing could spoil this moment.

She could not remember the last time she felt like this: alive. She counted William's birth and her entry into the secret society of motherhood separately. But she remember the first time Mulder and her actually made love to her. Genuinely made love. Right after those zombies and the start of the millennium. Now, she actually felt hope for the future. Watching the sunrise, in her mind, symbolized a new beginning. Nothing could ruin this new beginning.

“Scully?” he whispered, after kissing her brow.

“Hm?”

He paused, nuzzling her forehead, before being able to draw up the strength to ask the question that danced in the back of his mind. He read the report before, recalling it through a fog. She had shut her eyes. He remembered that much. But he also remembered the research he had done...

“Why did you want me to shut my eyes?”

She stiffened slightly and looked up, trying to pretend it was nothing. “I didn't want you to panic.”

A lie. A very cheap and ineffective one at that.

“Try again,” he replied, narrowing his hazel eyes.

He felt her shift uncomfortably and look at the rising sun. “You'd think I am crazy,” she mumbled.

Fellig's file. He shook his head, replying, “I found Fellig's file,” he replied evenly, his eyes focused solely on her. “You hid, poorly, might I add. Why the sudden interest?”

“A hunch,” she replied evasively.

“Scully,” he coaxed. “Don't lie to me.”

She sighed and closed her eyes. She sat straight up, her spine arching like a plank, and she felt Mulder instinctively rub her back, trying to smooth out any tension, figurative or otherwise. “Something Bruckman said to me.” She took a deep breath. “And he told me to close my eyes. I didn't die. Neither did you.”

“Scully,” he coaxed.

She closed her eyes, feeling tears. Why was she crying? She wiped her eye uselesly. He grabbed her hand and cupped her cheek. She tried to free herself uselessly. He steadied her and until she met his gaze.

“Tell me everything, Scully.”


	4. Dialogue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fourth chapter to “My Endurance.” My take on the cliff hanger of the “My Struggle II” and inspired by the episode “Tithanous." Hopefully the last chapter will be the conclusion.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's been a joy to write fanfic again, with this being the first piece I have written in 10 years. I got the bug again and it is such a joy. Expect more in the future :)
> 
> As far as this story goes, I expected this to be the last chapter but I am hitting an impasse/writer's block with it so I can going to try and conclude everything in the next/last chapter. Sorry. I hope you enjoy this little bit.
> 
> Disclaimer: Again, I own none of it. Chris Carter and company does. Just merely borrowing.

Mulder chewed his lip in thought as he watched Scully prepare them both dinner. Daggoo danced at her feet, wanting a table scrap to drop, or better yet, be fed one from her. She had been evasive all day as he poked and prodded, trying to question her about what had happened, or at the very least, what she believed had happened. He could tell that she was troubled by it but she had yet to talk.

He frowned and got up to stand behind her as she added the vegetables to their stir fry. He wrapped his arms around his waist and nuzzled her shoulder. “I'm almost done,” she replied softly.

 

“Why won't you talk about it?” he asked again, probably for the 1000th time that day.

 

“There's nothing to talk about.”

 

“It bothers you.”

 

“I'm fine, Mulder,” she replied again.

 

“How long have I known you,” he whispered, kissing her neck. “Don't lie to me.”

 

“I'm fine.”

 

He kissed her shoulder softly and closed his eyes. He knew Scully. He knew his Scully inside and out. He could feel the tension radiating off her. His right hand traveled to the small of her back, letting his fingers softly massage the small knot he found. She stiffened and let a small sigh of content, arching her back against him. “I'm fine, my ass, Scully.”

 

Scully straightened, collecting herself behind the same mask she had mastered over the years. “I'm telling you I am fine, Mulder. Now, are you going to stand there or help me with dinner?”

 

“I'll set the table and get the wine,” he sighed. He wondered if breaking into Fort Knox would be easier than trying to get her to talk about what was worrying her. He decided to change the subject. “Are you looking forward going back to the office tomorrow?”

 

She smiled and looked over her shoulder. “At least we don't have to hide it anymore, and they don't care enough to break us up.”

 

“Being the FBI's most oldest and unwanted has its perks,” he chuckled, kissing her. “Hurry up, I'm starving.”

 

“Make your own damn sandwich,” she laughed, turning back to their dinner.

 

….

 

Mulder relaxed as Scully dozed lightly against him, having fallen asleep while he watched _Sport Center_. Daggoo looked at him quizzically before deciding it was time for bed and trotted upstairs to their bedroom. He thought it was best they follow suite because tomorrow would be their first day back since this entire ordeal had started with the vaccines, further back to when Tad O'Malley walked into his life and he reached out to Scully for the first time in months since their seperation. But now, they were back. Mulder and Scully. The X-Files. FBI partners. Life partners, now and forever. He had his Scully back and that was all that mattered. He kissed her head affectionately and she mumbled, “What time?”

 

“Bed time. I gotcha.”

 

“Mulder...” she groaned, protesting her source of warmth moving.

 

“Wrap your arms around my neck,” he whispered affectionately. “This 55 year old still has it.”

 

The fact was, he had been feeling better lately. He did not know if it was an affect of the vaccine or what, but the pain he sometimes got in his lower back from his age had all but vanished. He banished the thought and lifted Scully in his arms easily. She wrapped her arms around her neck instinctively and sighed, settling back asleep.

 

This is why living was worth it. This moment right here.

 

….

 

Scully didn't remember going to bed. But then she remembered Mulder had brought her to bed. She blinked the sleep from her eyes and strained to look at the alarm clock. Three a.m. Their alarm would go off in another two hours. She groaned inwardly, wishing that she could sleep for a few more precious minutes but her worrying thoughts came back to here instantly. They usually did at that magic hour.

 

Sighing, she rolled onto her back, causing Mulder's snore to jar slightly before he instinctively reached across the bed, snaking his arm around her waist, and pulled her close. “You're thinking is keeping me awake.”

 

“Hm? Sorry,” she whispered. “Go back to sleep. No point in both of us not getting any sleep.”

 

“Do you want to talk about it,” he murmured, kissing her cheek softly.

 

She relaxed. She remembered the nights she could not sleep in her apartment when she left him, nothing seemed to be able to bring her peace. But him, right now...she felt herself relaxing, turning to her side. “You seem so insistent that I talk about it.”

 

“You can hide it when your conscious,” he sighed, blinking himself awake, “but you're unconscious mind can't.”

 

“Stupid profiler,” she teased, kissing him. “You found the old x-file, didn't you?”

 

“About Fellig? Yeah.” He rubbed her arm and pulled her close. “What's in that mind of yours, Scully?”

 

“Dr. Scully thinks it was the alien DNA and vaccine,” she whispered wearily, burying her face into his shoulder. “Agent Scully thinks it might be connected the Fellig case. Your Scully is scare and confused to why she did not lose what she cares about most.”

 

“Why did you tell me to close my eyes?”

 

“I...” She took a deep breath, trying to steady herself. “Fellig told me to close my eyes when I got shot. I could feel the coldness. I remember...I remember my last thoughts of being of you. But he told me to close my eyes and took my hand. He died instead of me. But I lived. You remember how quickly I healed, right?”

 

He nodded.

 

“Your recovery,” she spoke slowly, “was the fastest on record. I've been through the files, the lab reports, the police reports, the CDC reports...yours is the fastest and with the least complications. I don't know. I told you to close your eyes. I felt cold.”

 

“I did too.”

 

“You heard someone scream, didn't you,” she asked, almost begging for confirmation.

 

“Yes.”

 

“And the coldness abated.”

 

“Yes.” He nuzzled her cheek. “But you saved me, Scully. That's all that mattered.”

 

“But did the vaccine save you or did I save you from Death?”

 

Mulder sensed there was more to it. “What are you afraid of, Scully?”

 

She did not even realize that she had tears in her eyes. “I don't know.”

 

“Are you afraid of the fact you might be immortal, or that the alien DNA saved you?” he ventured, wiping away the tears. “I mean, you've aged quite gracefully but that's just my opinion.”

 

She chuckled through the tears.

 

“Go back to sleep,” he whispered, kissing her brow. “We'll continue this conversation tomorrow, okay?”

 

She nodded weakly and buried herself against him. He kissed her hair and gently caressed her back as she drifted back to a light sleep. He had only scratched the surface. Tomorrow...he would really get to the heart of the matter.

 


	5. Resolution

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> My take on “My Struggle II” with inspiration from the episode “Tithanous.” Finally the conclusion.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for all that stuck with this fic and read it. This was my first foray into writing X-Files fanfic and the first fanfic I wrote in over ten years. And the responses and joy I have gotten from writing this has given me the fanfic bug again. So till next time!
> 
> P.S. The disclaimer and what not: I own none of it, merely borrowing, Chris Carter and company own.

They rode into work together, walked into the Hoover building, and took the elevator down into their basement office. Mulder unlocked the office door and held it open for Scully. She smiled gratefully, giving him a chaste kiss on the cheek. Getting old really did have it's perks. When they started becoming romantically involved, she did everything in her power to hide it. But now, it seemed age had mellowed Scully.

 

“Just like old times, huh?” he asked, hanging their coats up on the hooks.

 

“Yep,” she replied, setting down her briefcase on the newly arrived desk that sat across the room. “And thank you for requesting the extra desk. It only took twenty years.”

 

“Haha.”

 

Mulder made a beeline to his desk and opened up his email. Scully took her seat across from the desk, elegantly crossing her legs and pulling out her smartphone. “We have a meeting with Skinner at nine,” she told him. “With Miller and Einstein.”

 

“About what happened?” he asked, looking up from his computer.

 

“Yes,” she replied simply.

 

“What are we going to tell them?”

 

“It's in our report,” she replied simply. “Old Smokey is back, engineered a conspiracy for the end of days, just like he did in the 1990s, tried to wipe out humanity, we saved the day with the vaccine. End of story.”

 

“What about us?”

 

“What about us?” she repeated, looking up from her phone.

 

“About last night...”

 

“I am not going to talk about it here. Now is not the time or the place. We're working.”

 

Mulder could hear the finality in her voice and he knew after twenty years not to argue with her about the matter. “This isn't over,” he replied, rising a finger accusingly at her. “We're talking about it.”

 

“It's nothing, Mulder.”

 

“You're losing sleep over it. You can't hide it at home.”

 

“Mulder,” she sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose. “We'll talk about it when we get home, okay?”

 

“Over dinner.”

 

“Fine. Over dinner.”

 

“I get to pick.”

 

“I am not eating subs again.”

 

“I didn't say anything about subs.”

 

“Or pizza.”

 

“Oh, come on. You love pizza.”

 

“Mulder...”

 

“Fine.”

 

“You get to pick, but please, try not to get take out from McDonald's down the road.”

 

“I won't,” he replied, looking back at the computer screen. He absently opened up to Google and searched 'easy and romantic dinners' before clicking enter. “We need to go grocery shopping though.”

 

She narrowed her eyes in annoyance. “I'm going to get us coffee. I'll be back.”

 

Mulder clicked on a recipe. Steaks. He could cook a steak. How hard could it be?

 

….

 

Skinner looked at Mulder and Scully sitting across from him. “You look good, Mulder,” he said absently, looking back down at their joint report.

 

“Thank you, sir.”

 

“So, some things never change do they?”

 

“Apparently not, sir,” Scully answered.

 

“Have they found any sign of him?” Skinner asked, referring to the Cigarette Smoking Man.

 

Scully looked at Mulder, and then back at Skinner. “No, sir.”

 

“And Monica Reyes?”

 

Scully shifted uncomfortably and Mulder replied, “We believe she was coerced against her will, either by blackmail or something similar. We haven't been able to find any sign of her as well. She's disappeared and we don't know if she is alive or dead.”

 

Scully still felt some sort of loyalty to the woman who helped her keep William safe during that year, no matter why she had sold out. Skinner nodded, satisfied with the report. “Just like old time, huh?” he repeated to his agents.

 

“Yes, sir,” they answered.

 

….

 

Home.

 

Scully played with her cross as she wondered what Mulder had planned for dinner as she changed into something more comfortable than her work pants and suit jacket. She pulled her long curls into a loose pony tail before glancing at her reflection.

 

She leaned on the dresser and reflected her own image. She managed to keep old age at bay, just like any other woman, through a beauty regimen wrought by the 21st century, diet and exercise dictated by doctors who had no idea what they were talking about, and sheer luck. She had aged well. Mulder had too. Maybe too well. She shook her head, dismissing such thoughts. Maybe it was genetics. Maybe it was that damn alien DNA. Maybe it was...

 

“Scully! Are you coming down or what?”

 

She blinked.

 

“Scully?”

 

“I'm coming, Mulder!”

 

She went down the ancient staircase of the farmhouse and her nostrils flared, sensing the sweet pan cooked steaks he had attempted. He was at the base of the staircase, waiting for her. “And here I thought I was was going to be waiting forever.”

 

She stopped at the base of the stairs and leaned into his chest, slowly wrapping her arms around his neck. Mulder was taken aback by this show. She kept him guessing. The new territory of being professional FBI partners again and domestic partners, at once, at the same time, without having to hide it, was unknown. It also nagged at him how the FBI was all seemingly okay with this. But he was an old man they kept hidden in the basement and probably did not care what he did anymore.

 

He returned the hug tightly, kissing her red hair. “Ready for dinner?”

 

She nodded and looked up, thanking God she did not lose him. Maybe she could put off her conversation a little longer if she changed the subject. “What did you make us tonight?”

 

…

 

Mulder was not happy. How the hell did she do it? He had every intention of interrogating Scully and getting to the bottom of what was wrong. He had a working theory but he was almost afraid to say it aloud, just like she was. It was almost a childish fear. If he spoke it outloud, it would give any credence to the crazy theory he knew he had formulating. But she had managed to deflect him and his line of questioning. Again. She was good.

 

He brushed his teeth and gazed at his reflection, determined to get something out of her tonight. Scully glanced up from her book that she had been reading when he emerged from the the bathroom and settled in on his side of the bed. “Whatcha reading?” he asked.

 

She lifted the cover of the book and he saw a well read version of _In Cold Blood_. “It's not my usual but I like Truman Capote,” she shrugged.

 

He smiled, realizing she had already anticipated his why. “Hm. Read anything else good lately?”

 

“Like the Fellig file?” she questioned, turning her gaze back down to the book.

 

“You've been avoiding me all day about it,” he replied. “First at work...”

 

“You know I don't like to discuss...personal issues at the office.”

 

“Then at dinner...”

 

“Which was delicious by the way.”

 

“Why don't you want to talk about it? It's the pink elephant in the room.”

 

She shut her book and stared at her hands. She was quiet for a long moment. “Maybe I just don't want to know the truth,” she admitted quietly.

 

He leaned against the headboard and stared at her questioningly. She looked at Mulder from the corner of her eyes and sighed. That look. Goddamn that look. That look that could get her to bear her soul on a whim. “Scully.”

 

“What happened to you that night, when I told you to close your eyes, happened to me too. That's how I knew. It could have been the vaccine too but I don't know. But at that moment, I just knew you needed to close your eyes. I just knew.”

 

“And you closed them with me.”

 

“Because you're afraid of the dark.”

 

He chuckled and set her book aside. She smiled and rolled her eyes. He flicked the TV on, lowered the volume until he almost muted it, and turned off the light. “So what if I am?”

 

Scully settled under the covers and nestled herself next to Mulder. “I'll keep you safe,” she teased, kissing him.

 

Mulder felt her relax next to him. “Why don't you want to know the truth?”

 

“Who wants to know when they die, or don't die,” she asked philosophically.

 

“Say...say we don't die,” he began slowly, “and we are immortal...”

 

“First it was just me and now you?” she teased.

 

He smiled slightly, knowing she was trying to deflect the situation with humor, something that he did. God, how weird it was to have their roles reversed. “Just say, for argument's sake, we can't die. What would be wrong with that? You won't lose me, I won't lose you...” He nuzzled her cheek. “We could do all those things that we've always wanted...like UFO hunting in Austrailia. Or taking another tropical vacation. Well, the first one is probably mine.”

 

She closed her eyes. “But would you really want to live that long, Mulder?”

 

“Not unless you are with me.”

 

“What about William?” she asked, unconsciously drawing random patterns with her fingers on his bicep. “What about our son?”

 

Mulder was quiet.

 

“I don't want to know. Fellig stopped aging. We haven't. We've gotten injuried. Fellig was stabbed multiple times in the back and was up walking around like it was nothing.”

 

Mulder said nothing. In his eyes, Scully was always going to be ageless, and she had gotten hurt too, but always made a quick recovery. Maybe there were varying degrees to it...

 

“Mulder, stop thinking.”

 

“You can hear me thinking?”

 

“No...you know what I mean. I don't want to know if we're immortal or not. I just know you recovered and we survived. That's all I want to know.”

 

“And it was the vaccine,” he said.

 

“It was the vaccine and alien DNA, not us cheating death,” she whispered into his chest.

 

He sighed, moving to rub her back. She would admit to aliens but not... “So if it is true,” he said after a long pause, “we'll just have to wait and see.”

 

“Even though probably not.”

 

“But we'll just have to wait and see,” he repeated again. “You always did like living in the now.”

 

“Mulder, for once can you just shut up and take this one little victory? You survived and we both got what we want, us.” She yawned and sighed. Mulder kissed her brow and she yawned again, even sleepier. “I love you and that is all that matters.”

 

“Go to sleep,” he replied, kissing her. “I promise I'll stop thinking.”

 

….

 

Sunrise. Scully sat on the porch, with coffee in hand, Mulder sitting beside her, both trying to delay getting ready for work as much as possible. Neither one of them spoke and just enjoyed each other's company. She leaned against his shoulder and he kissed her lightly. “I've been thinking,” he began.

 

“I thought I told you to stop thinking.”

 

“Just hear me out. As long as there's more of this,” he replied, motioning between them in then towards the sunrise, “immortal or not, I'll be a happy man.”

 

She smiled and turned her gaze back out to the sun. “I think we can endure anything the future throws at us then.”

 

-End.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Gah, don't hate me. I struggled on how to end this and leaving it open ended seem to fit. Who really wants to know when they die (or can't die for that matter)? Although the ending still seems too open to interpretation, I hope you all enjoyed it. I still have questions about the revival, like addressing the William issue, so there might be another fic down the line to follow 'My Endurance.'


End file.
